Why? Because I quit my job after over 4 years, which (for me) is wild. I don’t know where that time has gone (and that scares me). I know I was ready though. With that, comes a few care free weeks this August, until (like my school days) I’ll begin a new job in September. I think there’s something really nice about that, other than the few weeks of “carefree” days I have ahead of me right now. Something nice about it feeling like a new school year, like I ought to buy myself a new notebook and pens. It’s all computers now though, isn’t it?

Why the change?

I had been thinking about leaving for a while now, but I just felt that I’d finally stepped into some sort of career, which felt completely out of my reach to me before. As much as I loved working in hospitality in the past, it always came at the cost of everything else in your life. It was somehow acceptable for management to give you next week’s rota a day or two in advance, drop shifts or add ridiculous ones on. I could never make plans and I was so out of routine.

Getting my last job, the one I’ve just left, just felt as though I’d really achieved something. I got my weekends. I got regular income. I got stability. It turns out, routine is kinda helpful to me. Who knew? Maybe one day I’ll be writing about how exercise really helps (it almost definitely does).

Before this job, I felt like I was chasing a career, structure and decent pay. It honestly just felt impossible. So, when I got it, I think I just clung to it – so scared to let it go. In this job, I’ve gotten promotions, job changes within the company, an apprenticeship and a crack at a new career in HR. However, I think that in reality, I knew this was never really for me.

So, when I was offered my new job last month, I was excited, but also nervous. Worrying I wouldn’t be good at something else. It was scary to turn down the route I knew, with progression, but the end goal wasn’t somewhere I really wanted to go. I think I could have enjoyed Learning & Development, but the thought of actually ending up in HR didn’t sit right with me. It didn’t feel very authentic. I needed a career change.

Career change for more meaningful work

I needed something that felt more true to myself. I’ve always loved the arts – especially theatre, shows and community events. Attending these events really fills my bucket. I feel a genuine buzz and I leave wishing that anxiety hadn’t stopped me from pursuing drama through A-Levels and University, because that was always the plan.

Like I say, anxiety had other plans for me. It took away my A-Levels experience. I did terribly due to my lack of attendance due to panic attacks. Yet, since all my friends were going to university, I wanted to leave home as well.

I ended up on a business course. Not the worst mistake I’ve ever made, business will always be relevant. But I feel it’s a polar opposite to what I truly loved. Anxiety took that from me. I wonder how things would have gone otherwise. Following on from that, I decided I would apply for an events course at university. I guess there’s a lot of theatrics in events so this makes sense in hindsight. Then the years rolled by and somehow I’m 31, but life has happened, and I’m working in HR.

Cut forward to last month, I’m working in a job I feel isn’t for me. I feel the years rocketing by. It’s scaring me. So, when I’m offered a job doing events at a CIC, I bite the bullet.

Choosing happiness

I somehow already feel my energy returning to me. Not waking up feeing unauthentic to myself. I read or heard, or something – maybe it was an Instagram short – but it said something along the lines of jealously being a healthy way of steering you towards your own goals and aspirations, and you know what? I kinda get that.

Jealousy and comparing yourself to others isn’t, in itself, healthy. Everyone has their own paths and journeys. But perhaps there is something in that statement? Because I know when I meet creatives, or people in theatre and the arts – that’s where my jealously comes out, but honestly, good for them and thank you for being so inspiring!

I’ve always felt like that (arts and culture) is the path I want to be on, and seeing other amazingly talented people really fires me and drives me to pursue my own interests. Of course, not at the expense of others. I think it’s really important to ensure you’re doing these things for you and your interests.

A career change isn’t for everyone. I’m not telling everyone (or anyone) reading this to quit your job, (mainly because it’s just me reading this). I took months to come to this decision and I changed my mind more times than I can count, but now I have made the choice – I know I’m ready. This is such a personal choice where only you are going to know the right option, because only you know all your circumstances. I hate to quote my Mum’s favourite mantra right now, but it’s true.

“It’s about choice & consequence.”